In Freedom or Death
by a-whisper-to-a-riot
Summary: "There's a lot more going on between the new recruit and squad captain Laura." - Erwin returns with a recruit one day and places him under Laura's care. As a young man fresh off the streets, Rivaille has difficulties adapting to his new military life. - Rivaille/OC (Levi/OC)
1. First Meet

**Shingeki no Kyojin**

_**In Freedom or Death**_

_**Chapter One: First Meet**_

* * *

It wasn't unusual for soldiers to be called to Commander Erwin's office. The Scouting Legion was strict with their rules, and not everybody can follow them without a hitch. But most called to the commander's office included the higher ranked officers such as squad captains. Though when the higher-ranked officers were normally called, the commander would normally state the reason for calling them; and usually it was only updates or new orders. Out of the current captains, no one had expected Laura Tarell to be called to Erwin's office for unknown reasons.

Laura set a pace for herself as she walked. Erwin had only just returned this morning from his visit at Wall Rose, the chances of him finding out of her misconduct during his absence was near to impossible. Commander Erwin's trip lasted for a week, and during the week Laura and Hanji had stayed up past the usual lights out and this made them tardy almost every morning. It wasn't as if they were doing anything bad per se, they just spent their newfound freedom away from Erwin's watchful eye to play old maid and chess. Now that she thought back to it, there wasn't much merit to breaking curfew, they probably did it just for the sake of going behind Erwin's back. It was a dumb decision, and now Laura was going to hear it from Erwin. Someone must have ratted her out; only she was called to Erwin's office, this could only mean that it was either Richter or Jaime that ratted on her.

She paused outside the tall wooden door. She was beyond nervous, not once has she ever gotten in trouble with her commanding officers. Whenever she spoke to the commander, he only had praises or new orders for her. Instinctively, she began tapping her foot and crossed her arms as she stalled. She knew full well that stalling wouldn't do her any good, and the time available to her was limited before Erwin starts to lose temper over her tardiness. Without her even realizing, her foot began tapping faster and louder than before. But her thoughts were spinning in her head, and she could hardly hear anything else but her own voice screaming internally.

Laura was suddenly blinded when the door in front of her was pulled open. The suddenness startled her so that she took a short step back. Instead of Erwin at the door, there stood someone completely unfamiliar to her. He wasn't tall; she stood taller than him but only by no more than six centimeters. But what she noticed first wasn't his small stature, but the dreary look in his eyes. Lingering her gaze on his features, she didn't stop looking until he spoke.

"Was that you tapping behind the door?"

"… That's irrelevant," she regained her composure. "Who are you and why are you in Commander Erwin's office?"

"… Oi, Erwin, there's some woman here," ignored her remark and walked back into the room. "I thought you said we were waiting for someone important."

"Commander?"

Laura followed the stranger in and saw that her commander was sitting at his desk. It was like every other day, his desk was already filled with paperwork and mapping plans.

"Commander, what's going on?" Laura brushed past the other man and walked up to the table. "Why is there a civilian here?"

Before Erwin could reply, Laura heard something from behind her. A faint but very prominent sound… did he just click his tongue. Slightly offended by his impoliteness, she was about to give her a piece of his mind before Erwin stood up. He put a hand on her shoulder and gave a soft smile. Every ill thought she had of the other man disappeared. She gave a quick small nod and waited as he approached the man.

"Rivaille, this is Captain Tarell. One of my longest-serving officers and graduated top of her class," Erwin motioned for her to step closer. She did so and stepped right next to her commander. "You'll begin serving under her in a week."

"This kid?"

"Excuse me?" Laura once again took offense to his attitude. "I'd like to think with your height that I'm older?"

"Think again, dumb brat."

"… Commander, is he allowed to do that?" she turned to Erwin, her eyes furious. "To call his commanding officer a 'dumb brat'?"

"Of course not. Rivaille, though you may be older you'll have to show respect to those of a higher rank. I recall myself explaining things well on our way here."

Laura's eyes widened slightly at the commander's words. This person, Rivaille, was actually older than her? She was dying to know by how much, her original guess was that she was at least two or three years older; but it never occurred to her that he just had stunted growth. As she was lost in her thoughts once again, she failed to notice Rivaille eyeing her before turning away with a scowl.

"Tch, whatever," he hissed. "I apologize, Captain Tarell."

"… Well, okay then. Introductions complete," Erwin spoke when she didn't reply. "Laura, for now I want you to get Rivaille settled in. Find him a room and then bring him to the dining hall for lunch."

"Yes, understood. Should I get him a uniform?"

"That won't be necessary yet," Erwin turned to Rivaille. "After lunch, you're to come report to me right away, understood? We'll go over your first week then."

"Yeah."

Laura gave a salute before leaving the room after Rivaille. Though she had no idea how things will work out, she was in no position to complain. The most she can do was do her best to make the newest addition to the Legion feel at home. But she doubted how well he could adapt with their procedures and regulations.

"This way, Rivaille."

The Legion's castle outpost was old but the building makes up for its age with size. The main castle contains the kitchen, baths, dining room and various multi-purpose rooms. There are bedrooms in the upper floors that were assigned to the commander and captains. Outside of the castle were the stable and a large storehouse that's been refurbished into dormitories.

"The dorms are split into four sections," she explained as they made their ways down the stairs. "Half for the women and half for the men. If I remember correctly there are some spare bunks in the second men's quarters."

"… How many people in a room?"

"Four, two bunks in a room," she glanced back briefly. What she saw stunned her briefly. If she hadn't looked back she wouldn't have realized that he was watching her. Unlike a normal person, when their gazes met he just continued to stare at her. "… Yes? Do you have another question?"

"No."

As they entered the dorms' common room, all the soldiers that were currently lounging inside stopped chattering. It was unusual for a captain to come visit the dorms at this time of day; and even stranger to see the first squad's captain.

"Captain Tarell!"

It was a soldier that was in Laura's squad, Karl Freyer. Though not the brightest one of the bunch, he was certainly the most helpful and friendly. Laura greeted him back politely.

"Freyer, are you appointed in the first or second men's dorms?"

"First, ma'am!"

"Would it be possible for you to escort me to the second dorms?" she asked. "Commander Erwin brought back a new recruit and he needs a room."

"Understood, ma'am!"

Soldiers moved along skittishly as Karl marched down the hall with Captain Tarell and the supposedly new recruit. As he followed, Rivaille noticed that people were practically jumping out of the way at the sight of Laura. Even though she was a captain, it felt like they were overreacting. Or maybe the male soldiers were just embarrassed to have a woman trudging through their sanctuary.

The whole hallway had doors on either side, and on every door was a carved nameplate. Around a third of the way down the hall, they stopped moving. After dismissing Karl, Laura examined the doors on either sides and turned to Rivaille.

"We have lots of empty rooms available on this floor but those rooms are reserved the cadets that will be joining us in two months," she pointed towards a door as she explained. "So I'll be assigning to you to this room. You'll have a roommate, but I know the man and he won't give you any trouble."

"…"

"… Is this acceptable, Rivaille?"

"Yeah."

"Okay then," she turned on her heels. "Let's get to lunch then… Oh! Before I forget, I wanted to ask you something."

"What?"

"How did you manage to get recruited two months earlier than all the other cadets?" she noticed him twitch slightly. "… Were you the top of your class or something?"

"No."

"Care to elaborate?"

"… I've received no formal training before coming here."

"… Seriously?"

Rivaille's only reply was a hostile look he sent towards her. Taking note of the look, Laura turned away.

The first thought that came up to her mind was: _'does this guy have a death wish or something?'_ And the second thought was why Erwin would even consider letting someone without any experience or proper training join the Scouting Legion.

"Laura?"

"… Huh? Oh, uh-… try to keep that to yourself, okay? Many of the soldiers here take pride in their two years as recruits and it may bother them that you were recruited without going through the same."

"I see. Okay."

**XoXo**

After showing Rivaille to the dining hall, Laura talked him through the general basics of kitchen and meal duties. It felt like he was ignoring her half the time, but she continued speaking though it was probably more benefiting for her own self-esteem than actually helping him. After giving him a run-down, she left to join the other captains at their table at the front of the room.

"Laura!" Hanji waved. "How were things with Erwin?"

"Yeah, Laura, we were awful worried when we heard you were called to Erwin's by yourself," Jaime chuckled. "Did the princess finally get scolded?"

"…" giving the man a square stare, she turned to Hanji. "Good, turns out he didn't know anything about our misconduct."

"Lucky!" Hanji grinned. "Then what did he need you for?"

"… There's a new recruit being placed in my squad."

"That midget that walked in with you?" Richter scoffed.

"His name is Rivaille and don't call him a midget."

"Exactly, Richt," Jaime began barking again. "Our lil' princess Laura's only a teensy bit taller, you'll hurt her feelings if you start going around calling people midgets."

"Classy as ever…" Richter rolled his eyes. "Anyway, how much do you bet that we'd get less than fifty new recruits this year?"

"Fifty, really?" Hanji exclaimed. "I know we get the runt of the bunch, but isn't fifty too little?"

"I say at least eighty," Jaime nodded meaningfully. "And I hope that out of those we'll get some cute girls. Not that we'd ever get bored of you, Laura-chan~."

"You're giving me the creeps," Laura flinched and inched away from the man imposing in her personal space. "… But I actually think fifty's too many. I say thirty."

"Seriously," Richter sighed. "There's no hope for the new generations. They're all too concerned with protecting themselves to care about the rest of humanity."

"What's this Richter-sama, are you starting to get philosophical on us?"

"God, shut up, Jaime! Why you gotta go ruin my cool lines?"

Laura laughed along as her fellow captains joked about. It was usual for her to be surrounded with such these warm and friendly people. Laura knew Richter and Jaime from her recruit days, and they graduated second and third in the class respectively. They got to know Hanji after being promoted to captains, and the four never failed to have their meals together after a long day of work.

"You know Laura, we were just thinking-."

Before Jaime could finish his sentence, a crash came from behind Laura. By reflex, the captains dropped everything and jumped from their seats. The view that met Laura was unbelievable. A long table was knocked over completely, trapping a number of men on the other side; and stood in front of it was none other than Rivaille.

As more people began whispering, Laura realized that she was responsible for this man. If not for her no one will step in to intervene. After all, most didn't even know who he was.

"Rivaille! Front and center!"

Laura tossed aside the fork that she was gripping from earlier, and walked to the Rivaille. He was meeting her glare straight on, without even having the decency to wipe that smug look off his face. Laura paused two meters before him and crossed her arms. She sent a deadly look around the hall and everyone immediately turned away.

"Okay, those that are done should probably leave first," Hanji's voice called from the front of the hall. "Captain Jaime's squad should go start preparing for this afternoon's patrol."

Almost half of the hall cleared out. Jaime and Richter took initiative and helped the men trapped under the table. They proceeded to leave with a majority of their own squads. Now the only ones left in the hall were the soldiers that haven't finished their meals yet. But they knew better than to stick around long and were already rushing to polish their plates.

"What's the meaning of this, Rivaille?" Laura spoke softly.

"I was asked to show respect to my superiors," Rivaille huffed. "I didn't do anything wrong."

"No, you've assaulted someone from the Legion. Though not your superiors, they are your equals. I don't know what gave you the thought to think it was okay to cause a scene but you must also treat your equals with the same respect-."

"No, _you_ misunderstand, Laura," Rivaille took a step forward and met her gaze. "I will only take orders from my superiors. And these dumbasses aren't my equals. I don't give two shits about everyone else."

"… I know you're new but these people are your people now. We can't afford to have an internal strife. You need to-."

"Quit your preaching," Rivaille scowled. "I'm already following Erwin's orders by listening to you. He didn't ask me for anything more."

"Look here!" Laura raised her voice. "You're not going to get anywhere with that attitude of yours! I don't care what kind of shithole you were in previously that made you have a need to act this way, but your circumstances have changed! You've-!"

"Laura, that's enough. I'll take it from here."

At the sound of her commander's voice, Laura's own voice ended in a tiny squeak. Though she was embarrassed by her sudden outburst, she couldn't bring herself to turn away from Rivaille.

"Rivaille, go wait in my office."

Only when Rivaille turn away did Laura snap out of her trance. She hadn't even noticed herself feeling hot until she looked away. It seems that yelling at really got her winded up. She sighed as she pulled her jacket off.

"… Laura, you'll have to excuse his behavior," Erwin sighed. "He was brought up very differently from how you were. I don't think it'll be easy for him to grasp the concept of compliancy or friendship any time soon."

"Commander, do we really need someone like him?"

"I believe he'll make a fine soldier."

"You better be right about this, Commander."

"I'm not saying it won't take work. Rivaille has put a wall around himself to keep other people out. We'll just need to break down that wall and have him slowly adapt to life here."

"And I'm hoping you're not relying on me to go knocking on his wall."

"Well yes, that was the general plan."

"Just leave it to Laura, Commander!"

Out of nowhere, Hanji pops into their conversation and puts an arm around Laura's shoulders.

"You can rely on Laura to bring out someone's potential," Hanji laughed. "And if not, then we can just feed him to the titans!"

"I'm not sure that's something to laugh about…" Laura smiled slightly at Hanji's attempt at diffusing their conversation. "But alright, Commander. I'll do what I can for Rivaille when he enters my squad."

That was a careless promise she made. Laura wasn't even sure she could keep her word, but that won't stop her from trying. At the moment, she had no real positive opinions on Rivaille. She's never seen him in action, and his personality can use some work; but if her commander believes in him then she'll at least give him a try.

* * *

**Hello readers! This is my first SnK fic and honestly I'm finding it very difficult to write Rivaille. I love the guy, but he's so freaking awkward at times. **

**Well anyways, here's the first chapter and I hope you all enjoyed it! This story is set before the main story's events obviously and will show Rivaille's gradual change from unpredictable ex-thug to the lovely corporal we all know and love :3**

**I always appreciate reviews, especially for new stories! :)**


	2. Seven Days

**Shingeki no Kyojin**

_**In Freedom or Death**_

_**Chapter Two: Seven Days**_

* * *

A day after meeting Rivaille, him and Erwin left the outpost again. The commander wasn't very open with the details but apparently Rivaille was to spend the week training and have his assessments taken on the last two days. It was crazy to think that someone would be able to complete two years worth of work in a single week, especially considering that they were going to see Keith Shadis. Laura tried not to think too much of it. Currently he was still under Erwin's care and she'll only need to start taking responsibility for him when he officially joins her squad.

A week went by quickly; over the seven-day period any lingering thoughts of Rivaille were pushed to the back of Laura's mind. She's had her hands full with going on patrols and organizing the next expedition. Though Laura had no problem cutting down a 15-Meter Class titan on her own, planning expedition routes was not a strong point of hers. Squad captains were required to draw an outline of a proposed route and the purpose for that very route. Rarely do any of their routes get approved, but Erwin thought that it helped to remind what their purpose was; and that they were humanity's best hope of discovering the unknown that lied beyond the walls.

It wasn't the incentive that bothered her; in fact, Laura had always been eager to come up with an amazing plan that would impress not only her fellow captains but the commander as well. But the problem was that she didn't even know where to start. Hanji's plans usually corresponds to studying and capturing of live titans, she always delivers a passionate presentation; and at the unlikely chance a captain's plan is chosen, it's always most likely to be hers. Laura was the complete opposite, she'd always miss out on some detail on her not so perfect plans and embarrass herself during meetings on the expedition.

"Hey Laura, how's it going?"

Laura was sitting in the common room in the captains' quarters. Sprawled across the table were her planning documents, a lamp, and a file of previous records. Whenever presentations were getting close, she'd always lose her composure. She'd refuse to work in her own quarters and work outside, in fear that she'd be tempted to take a quick nap only to realize that she'd slept through the night.

The chair across from hers was pulled out and Richter sat down. He didn't say anything as he watched her work, probably waiting for a reply to his earlier greeting. Laura continued scribbling before pausing and crumpling up the piece of paper with a grumble.

"Bad…" she finally replied. "So bad, I hate coming up with expedition ideas!"

"But you have prepared something, yes?"

"… Yeah, but I'm not telling you."

"Let's see it. Can't be as bad as Jaime's idea…" Richter picked up the paper she tossed over and flattened it out. "… Count the number of trees in the forest? You're joking."

"No, I'm not joking. By mapping out the forest, we'll gain advantage when we're engaged in combat with titans. Maybe we can even build tree forts or- oh god! I have no idea what I'm rambling on about," she groaned. "Come on, Richter. Help me out here. What are you proposing?"

"Press past our mapped areas and see if we can discover some new land."

"Reckless as always."

"I prefer ambitious."

"… What about Jaime's?"

"Oh, you'll see."

"You know, now's not really a great time to be act all mysterious with me."

"It's a secret!" Richter shrugged. "He made me promise."

Laura sighed, giving up on pressing further. She wasn't actually that interested but it'd be reassuring to know that she wasn't the only one that's going to embarrass herself in front of the commander during tomorrow's meeting.

As she returned to her writing, Richter sat in silence again. He knew she probably wouldn't be looking back up at him again unless he spoke, but he also knew not to disturb her when she's in a panic.

"Say, isn't that guy coming back tomorrow as well?"

"Who?"

"Uh… what's his name again?" he struggled to jog his memories. "The short one."

"Oh, Rivaille you mean," she looked up briefly before returning to writing. "… Oh my god! You're right!"

She dropped her quill completely and looked up again. Her expression was a mix of embarrassment and displeasure. If he had to guess, she had completely forgotten about him while she was worrying over the meeting.

_'How clumsy.'_

"Sorry I brought it up… well forget about him for now," Richter tapped her plans. "Let's just get your proposal done. I'll help you out."

Laura knew he was right, she had to focus on the proposal at hand; but it was also his damn fault for bringing Rivaille up. There was no way she'd be able to concentrate now, the thought of seeing Rivaille again made her feel uneasy and anxious.

**XoXo**

Early next morning, the commander once again returned after a week of absence. Soldiers saluted as Erwin entered the castle, and along with the commander was the troublemaker recruit now fully dressed in the Legion's uniform. Everybody's heard of the recruit that went and flipped a table in the dining hall, and he was also the one that made Captain Tarell lose her temper afterwards. All the current soldiers shared the same thought, and that was to stay away from Rivaille.

"Rivaille, I've got a meeting to get to. So why don't you go put your bags away and join the others for breakfast?"

"Yeah, okay."

After dropping his bags off in his room, Rivaille headed to the dining hall he was shown to before. He knew he wasn't popular amongst the soldiers, but it wasn't as if he was here to make friends anyway. After he picked up a tray of food, he went to sit at an empty table. It was still early but people were slowly entering the dining hall. He noticed that people were staring at him and tended to avoid going the direction of his table.

From the corner of his eyes, he saw the same group of captains walk in. There she was again, the girl that he was supposed to work under. She looked to be troubled as she was speaking to her peers, her eyes anxious and lips quivering as she listened to Captain Jaime Wellings.

Over the week most of his mind was focused solely on training and preparing for the assessments, but every once in a while when he had free time his mind would wander back to her. The moment he saw her he was taken in by her features, her hair and eyes in particular. Rivaille didn't know how to quite describe her hair – a reddish brown, perhaps; whatever it was called he's certainly never seen anyone with that colour before. As well as her hair, her eyes were something else as well. A stunning green that made him stare at her like an idiot the first time he saw her.

Though he was somewhat entranced by her appearance, it was downgrading to think that he's going to have to take orders from someone over five years his junior. But it wasn't as if he has any say in the situation and he'll only hope that he'd be promoted soon.

"Good morning, Rivaille."

Laura appeared before him, he hadn't even heard her approach and she was just standing across the room a moment ago. It was a little alarming how quickly she got to his table, but he realized that she wasn't a captain for nothing.

"Morning."

"I heard you were back," she sat across him. "How did it go?"

"I passed."

"… Impressive… That's really impressive, Rivaille. The commander was right to think you were talented."

She was actually beyond impressed; she was in fact amazed. He had just completed a two-year course in a week and managed to pass under that Keith Shadis. Even she had trouble with Instructor Shadis when she was taking part in the course.

"Yeah."

Laura was a little uncertain of his impassive response, but then she remembered that it was probably because she had yelled at him the last time they saw each other. As she realized this, things suddenly felt rather awkward between the two. Laura may have said that she was going to give it her all to help Rivaille, but she wasn't very confident that she'd be able to do it. Not to mention she was supposed to act as his commanding officer. Erwin was better off sending Rivaille to Hanji or Jaime's squad if he had wanted him to make friends so badly.

"Look Rivaille, I was really rude the last time we spoke," she failed to meet his eyes as he kept them focused elsewhere. "I just wanted to apologize here and hope that we can put that behind us?"

"… Are you really so desperate to suck up to Erwin that you'd give in and say sorry to me?"

"Excuse me?"

"I don't really care about feelings and that crap… It shouldn't matter anyway because I will follow your orders without question. Even though you're just some kid, you're also a captain… so act like one."

Laura wasn't sure if that was a pledge of his loyalty to her or if he was trying to disguise his dislike for her. But whatever the case, it didn't seem as if he wanted to speak with her anymore. It felt more like he dismissed her than the other way around.

"Well, then watch that attitude of yours and come report to me after breakfast."

"Okay."

With a strange feeling lingering within her, Laura returned to the captains' table. The second she sat down she gave a large sigh.

Unknown to her, the captains have all been straining to eavesdrop on Laura's conversation with Rivaille. They were able to make it out the conversation only because everyone else in the dining hall was doing the same and whilst they were speaking, the room was practically silent. But it seemed that neither Rivaille nor Laura realized as they were too absorbed in their talk.

"You okay?"

"Yeah," she nodded quickly. "Tired me out a bit… it's difficult to talk to him."

"So even the precious Laura Tarell has people she can't talk to," Jaime smirked. "Maybe it's fated love? The scary lone wolf recruit swoops in from the blue to swoop our beloved-."

"That's enough, Jaime," Richter chuckled lightly. "Look, you're making her uncomfortable again."

"It's fine, I'm used to it anyway," she smiled slightly. "But enough about that, I can't believe your plan actually got approved Hanji."

"You're telling me!" Hanji grinned. "I wonder what kind of lovely specimens await us~."

"… Look now, Richt," Jaime sighed, "You shut me up and get her talking about her creepy fetish."

Their conversation went on with Richter and Laura defending Hanji's enthusiasm, but despite them defending her at the end none were too pleased with having to hear her ramble on. After they were finished with their meals, each went their ways to prepare for their days. Hanji was on patrol today, which meant that Laura's squad had tomorrow's patrol. So for today, Laura will be able to help Rivaille around.

Like she had asked, after breakfast Rivaille came to see her. She had assembled her squad in the courtyard and had Rivaille stand beside her at the front. It was a little more intimidating than usual, she could already see the uncertainty in their eyes; but Laura was determined to make sure Rivaille would be given a warm welcome.

"Good morning soldiers. I'm sure most have already heard that we've got a new recruit. I want you to disregard what you've seen and what you've heard about Rivaille, he's a capable and reliable man that both Commander Erwin and I have put our trust in. He's one of us now, and I-."

Rivaille watched Laura as she spoke. She was charismatic; what doubt the soldiers had to begin with, looked to have vanished completely. Most of the squad now looked to him with newfound admiration. The kind of attention that he knew he didn't deserve, but Laura was really sugarcoating everything she's saying. He knew she was doing it for his sake, but he wasn't all that concerned over his own reputation.

After the introductory speech, Laura dismissed her soldiers back to their posts. She then turned to Rivaille.

"Let's go, shall we?"

He had no idea what she meant, but he followed without a word. They walked around to the back of the castle and entered from the backdoor. From then on did he realize that she was giving him a tour of the outpost; she was detailed with her explanations and provided some information on how the squads take turns taking charge different duties.

After the lengthy tour, they returned to the dining hall where they sat this morning.

"Like the various daily duties we have, the squads also take turns going out on patrol," she explained. "We're going tomorrow, and I trust you'll have no problem coming along?"

"None."

"Glad to hear.

It was only a smile, a tiny one; but Rivaille wasn't prepared for it. It made him feel strange inside, not bad exactly, but conflicted. She didn't even notice the change and continued explaining the basics of their patrols.

Patrolling and titan-killing was something Laura took pride in, she spoke about the concepts and her past experiences in great lengths. It wasn't that Rivaille wasn't listening to her, but he was also scrutinizing her; he realized that her looks were what really threw him off. Everything about her screamed elite; she was far too polished, and he was keenly looking out for any faults that he may have overlooked.

There was nothing at all. Not even the slightest of imperfections. This girl must have been what people called flawless. Very much to his dismay, all he's confirmed from his inspection that she really was just a young girl that was much too beautiful for her own good. He can't imagine how the male soldiers have managed working with such a captain around; she seemed more like a trap placed conveniently to catch people out.

Rivaille wanted to get up and leave. He was having a hard time maintaining eye contact with her; the more he stared the more his thoughts wandered. There was a specific type of plant that her eye colour reminded him of, but he had no hope of pinpointing it; every plant looked just about the same to him but he was able to differentiate a few through their smell.

"Oh? What have we here?"

Jaime had just returned to his patrol to find Laura and her new recruit in the dining hall. He had planned to take a short break before filing his report, but it seems he's found something more interesting to do. It was strange when he approached them; they were so caught up in their conversation (well Laura was speaking one-sidedly) that they didn't even notice him until he was right by their table.

"Back already?" Laura's smile dropped. "That was awfully short."

"As oppose to running into trouble and fighting for my life?" Jaime grinned. "Yeah, I'd rather have a nice and easy patrol. But anyway, is this seat taken?"

"Yes, go away."

"How about that one?" Jaime pointed to the empty spot next to Rivaille. "That taken?"

"Yes," Laura frowned. "Go away, really!"

"Gee, what's the harm in getting to know the new guy," Jaime ignored her grumbles and pushed into the seat beside her. "Hey there, I'm Jaime. I'm a captain like Laura."

"Rivaille."

"Nice to meet you!" Jaime grinned. "So what did you two get up to?"

"I showed him around the castle," Laura shimmied closer to the edge of her seat. "And I was just telling him of our duties including chores and patrols."

"Really? So what do you think, Rivaille? Our home's pretty great, isn't it?"

"…"

"God Jaime, why do you always feel the need to overwhelm people when you first meet them?" Laura smacked his shoulder lightly. "Don't worry about it, Rivaille. You can just ignore him."

"I was just being friendly, jeez," Jaime shrugged. "Right, Rivalle?"

"… It's a dirty."

"What?"

"The castle is filthy, the dorms especially; can we fix that?"

The captains grew completely silent. They heard his words, but it was as if they went in through one ear and left the other completely unprocessed. Jaime was first to recover and gave an amused grin.

"… Can you repeat that?"

"The castle is covered in dust and the dorms are repulsive," Rivaille frowned this time, his eyes showing his annoyance. "I'm asking for permission to clean."

"… Well, I think it's a good idea. What do you say, Laura?"

"Huh? What?"

"You're his commanding officer. So give your word."

Their eyes were on her. Never mind Jaime, but Rivaille was finally looking at her. For the whole time they were speaking, Laura couldn't maintain eye contact with him; he'd always end up looking away whenever their eyes met; but now, he was looking directly at her.

"Uh, yeah… that's fine," Laura looked down quickly, hiding her own embarrassment. "I'll leave that to you then."

Jaime burst out laughing then; much to Rivaille's surprise and Laura's dismay, she grew even redder than before but this time with irritation. She looked back up and glared at the blond man.

"Don't you need to go do your paperwork or something, Jaime?"

"Nah, I'll leave that for later," Jaime shrugged. "I'm gonna get my guys to help Rivaille out with the spring cleaning."

"… Then I'll head upstairs first, I've still got some things to do."

With that, Laura got up and left the table. Both Jaime and Rivaille watched her disappear behind the doors; once she was out of view, Jaime let out another chuckle.

"So, what do you think?"

"About?"

"Our very own princess Laura."

"… I'm not interested in gossiping," Rivaille looked away. "I'd prefer to start cleaning."

"You're kind of weird, aren't you?"

"I don't want to hear that from the likes of you."

"You know, I heard you were supposed to play nice with your superiors," Jaime grinned. "You wouldn't want me to go tell on you for your mean words, do you?"

Rivaille squeezed his palms into tight fists. This man was hard to handle. If he weren't careful, he'd easily fall under his influence. He knew better than to make a scene again, but he also hated obliging to someone that was deliberately taunting him.

"… No, I'm sorry."

"It's fine! I was only joking," Jaime gave his usual grin. "… But seriously, thoughts on Laura?"

"What is it to you anyway?"

"What would you think if I told you we dated?"

"You and Laura?"

"Yep."

"… You're lying."

"You're sharp! How did you see through me?" Jaime faked a mortified gasp. "… But I guess that is kind of unbelievable… Maybe next time I'll just say we had a one night stand or something…?"

Rivaille watched in distaste as the man mutter to himself. He couldn't decide whether Jaime was annoying or scheming, or maybe perhaps even both. But whatever the case, Rivaille disliked being in his company.

"… Jaime, can we start cleaning now?"

"Ease up a bit, Rivaille!" Jaime shrugged. "You only just got here! What's the harm in-."

"Excuse me, Captain Wellings!"

"Sup'?"

Rivaille recognized the man as Karl Freyer, the overly eager soldier in Laura's squad. Behind Karl stood the rest of Laura's men. It was slightly overwhelming to have a whole squad standing in formation before the two men, especially since they had no idea why they had assembled.

"Y-Yes? What is it?" Jaime gave a sheepish smile. "Can I help you?"

"We were instructed to assist Rivaille-san and Captain Wellings."

"Really?"

"Yes… but Captain Tarell didn't mention what it is we'll going to be doing."

"Well, you'll find out," Jaime finally stood up and put on his captain face. "Squad Laura will split up, one half go gather my squad and the other half go retrieve the cleaning equipment from storage. Afterwards, we'll all meet in the courtyard. From there I'll explain how we're going to do this."

"Yes sir!"

The men left the hall to get on with their orders. Rivaille was slightly peeved by how the man can change his attitude from loud-mouthed idiot to serious captain. Rivaille stood up and went to join the others. He knew there was a lot of work to do, and he was somewhat grateful that Laura had asked her men to help out. And even though Jaime was an idiot, his squad still made a large difference in terms of covering ground.

**XoXo**

After hours of work, Laura finally finished all her paperwork that she's neglected on during Erwin's absence. As capable as she was when she began working, she liked to put things off to the last minute; and it only made her time management worse when the commander was absent.

She was slightly hungry as she missed lunch earlier, but decided to wait for dinner as the kitchen would no doubt be busy at this moment. Instead, she decided she'd go get a cup of tea from the pantry.

Laura emerged from her quarters to find the corridor a lot cleaner than she remembered it being a few hours ago. It was like her home has turned into a foreign place; who would have thought that a little cleaning can have such a large impact. To be honest, when she first heard that Rivaille wanted to clean, she was a little astounded. Complaining about it was one thing, but he actually requested permission for him to do something about it. She wasn't fully aware of it, but subconsciously, her opinion of Rivaille went up by a tiny bit.

When she reached the pantry, she saw that there were already others inside. It wasn't unusual as the castle's pantry was large enough to fit in two-seater table.

"Hey, Laura," Richter greeted. "Commander and I were just getting some tea."

"Yeah, me too," she turned to Erwin. "Commander."

"Laura, have you finished your paperwork?"

"Yes sir, filed them just now."

Laura gave the commander a polite nod before heading to the shelves. The men returned to their quiet conversation while Laura prepared her cup of tea. After pouring her cup, Laura went to sit by the windowsill as she listened in on the conversation.

"And Laura," Erwin looked to the girl. "I'm hoping it wasn't you that put Rivaille up to that large cleaning operation?"

"On the contrary, it was he who requested permission to clean," Laura smiled meekly. "And Jaime happened to be there, so I'm guessing that's how everyone got involved."

"… I see," Erwin nodded. "That's surprising… what do both of you think of Rivaille?"

"Haven't spoken to him," Richter shrugged. "Laura?"

"… He's a little strange, and also to add to that – rude," Laura stared at her mug. "I'm just hoping he'd meet up to your expectations, Commander."

"He will," Erwin assured her. "And he'll meet yours as well, Laura."

"Yes, Commander."

When Erwin and Richter returned to their conversation, Laura sat in silence, her thoughts finally running free after a long day of work. She took occasional sips from her mug as she watched soldiers work in the courtyard. From a quick glance, it looked like they were moving furniture back indoors. They must have moved them out of the way earlier so they could thoroughly give the castle a wash.

Laura grew heavy-lidded as she continued to stare off. The combination of a hungry stomach and warm tea was making her feel sleepy. It shouldn't be long before dinner, but she wandered if she should just take a short nap. As she had the internal debate, she took another sip from her mug. From the corner of her eye, she spotted someone below looking at her.

It was Rivaille. He was watching her from the ground floor. She had no idea when he got there, but he was standing beside the diminishing pile of furniture. Laura brought the mug away from her lips steadily; she had no idea how to react to his staring. Her first instinct told her to just look away, but for some odd reason she ended up giving him an awkward wave. He looked pained momentarily, but returned a wave in the same jerky manner. He then got on with the rest of his work and soon disappeared back into the castle with a tall stack of chairs.

Laura hadn't realized she was gripping her mug so tight until she finally lost sight of Rivaille. She loosened her hold and let out a shaky breath. She had no idea why that experience made her feel so nervous, but honestly she'd rather just forget about it.

* * *

**Dilemma: I like writing his name as Rivaille but I say it Levi, if not I'd just be calling him ravi-a-oli or like '**_**reee-vilee**_**'. **

**Anyways! A big thank you to everyone that reviewed the last chapter! I was super excited to receive so many reviews for a new story, and I was happy to have such wonderful feedback! Once again a big thank you!**

**Reviews:**

Liania – thank you for your review, and I'm glad you're enjoying the fic!

**Don't forget to leave a review!**


	3. The Patrol

**Shingeki no Kyojin**

_**In Freedom or Death**_

_**Chapter Three: The Patrol**_

* * *

On the morning of Rivaille's first patrol, he got a knock at door at the crack of dawn. Karl Freyer was at the door, claiming that he was instructed by the captain to help Rivaille collect his equipment and procure him a horse before the patrol. Now Rivaille had no idea what made the man think he needed to wake him an hour before morning role call; there was plenty of time for them to get the things they needed even after breakfast. But this ass-kissing idiot just had to wake him up at daybreak.

Whatever the case, Rivaille dragged his sleepy butt out of bed and followed Karl to the storage first and the stables after. By the time they got everything done, it was only minutes before role call. Rivaille and Karl joined the lineup in the dorms, and after they were checked off they headed to the dining hall. To add to the list of things that were bothering him: first the idiot Karl, his boots dirtying due to the early morning muddy soil, and now watching Laura and the other captains skip into the room looking like they hadn't a care in the world.

Rivaille sat himself down at the empty table furthest from the others. As many soldiers preferred to put some distance between them and their commanding officers, the empty table at the front so happened to be one closest to the captains' table. When Jaime saw Rivaille, he immediately called out to him and went to greet him. From behind Jaime's approaching figure, he saw Laura staring at them; and when he gave her a light nod, she returned the gesture before turning away.

"Hey man!" Jaime stopped at his table. "Why're you sitting alone?"

"Does it matter?"

"How can you be so grouchy in the morning?" Jaime sighed as he sat down. "Not sleep well or something?"

"I slept fine."

"Then?"

"… I'm just sleepy. I was woken up almost two hours before roll call."

"Really?" Jaime grinned. "I couldn't really tell. You always just look like you need to stab someone."

"…"

Rivaille frowned as he looked back down to his food. Like he thought, making an effort to speak to this guy was fruitless; he should just have shut his mouth and waited for him to go away. The longer they sat there in silence, the more Rivaille wanted to pull a table-flip again. Rivaille looked up and saw that Jaime was glancing over back at his table.

_'Yes, go back to that shitty table of yours already.'_

"Say… Why don't you come sit with us?"

"No, I'm fine here."

"Aw… come on, Rivaille-kun."

"… I am older than you."

"What's the problem anyway?" he pouted. "You'd let Laura call you cute names."

"I wouldn't actually."

Jaime rolled his eyes as he nodded lightheartedly. He then got up and left Rivaille to his meal. It had ended so suddenly that Rivaille thought he might have said something wrong, but when he looked up to check, he saw that Jaime had joined back the table and was being his usual loud self.

Rivaille rushed through the remainder of his meal and left ahead of the other soldiers. There was still some time left before the patrol, but he'd prefer solitude than being in the bustling halls.

**XoXo**

It was a pleasantly cool morning for a patrol. The sun hadn't begun blazing yet, and there were occasional breezes. Laura couldn't have asked for a better day to take a new recruit out. Before leaving the outpost's premises, Rivaille was instructed to keep at least two horse length behind Laura. He wasn't very keen on her treating him like some idiot that couldn't even take care of himself, but he chose to comply as he was also somewhat curious with how Laura moved in action.

Rivaille found out that soldiers in a squad took turns going on patrol with the captain. The patrol squad moved in a small four-person unit, but a pair-system is also established beforehand. Laura had gotten Rivaille paired up with her, and she explained that they were supposed to have each other's backs if worst came to worst. The other pair of soldiers was Karl and a lady named Fran.

The patrol route was simple; they were to circle around the outskirts surrounding the outpost. There are also a number of checkpoints they're to pass without fail. During the off chance that they encounter titans, the captain will make a judgment and choose to engage or not. Titans don't usually stray all the way out here, and if the unlikely did happen then they're usually the smaller 3-7 meter classes. If they were to encounter a 15-meter class type or a deviant, then they're supposed to retreat and report it back to the commander.

They have been moving at full speed for a little over an hour already. The whole time Rivaille galloped behind Laura, a little bothered by the lack of action. It didn't help that the whole group was painfully quiet; the only time Laura interrupted was when she had to introduce an area they were passing. So far they've past a ruin, two forests and an abandoned town.

At the town, there had been stray titan that had been hiding behind a building. It popped out of nowhere and began chasing them down the streets. It was a 7-meter class, and Laura had gotten rid of it in a flash. One moment they were being chased, and the next Laura gave them a signal and hopped off her horse and onto a nearby rooftop.

Karl and Fran had insisted they keep going despite their captain missing, but Rivaille couldn't help himself but glance over his shoulder as he followed the others. He watched as Laura's small frame ran along the rooftops and stopped when she was right beside the titan. The titan noticed Laura immediately and ceased chasing after the other soldiers; Laura remained still as ever it advanced closer to the rooftop she stood on. Only when it was directly in front of her did she take a step back and shoot her hook. At such a distance, the hook shot straight into the titan's neck.

With its attention diverted directly to Laura, Rivaille brought his horse to an abrupt stop. He watched closely as Laura prepared to advance. She leant towards the right and ran by the titan and off the edge of the roof. The next moments were terrifyingly fantastic; Laura propelled herself around the titan to the reach its back, solely relying on momentum and the hook shot into the titan earlier. Once reaching the peak of her height, she went for the kill. She moved so quickly that Rivaille could only follow her silhouette.

Drop. Spin. Cut. Land.

The titan collapsed in less than five seconds. Laura landed back onto the rooftop as carcass began spitting and sizzling. She began making her way back towards them as she sheathed her blades. Laura whistled for her horse and it returned to her in no time.

"Great kill, Captain!"

"Let's not linger," she gave a nod at the praise. "We don't have long until we reach our last checkpoint."

"Yes, ma'am!"

They began moving again, and after another thirty minutes they slowed down the pace when they neared another forest. This one had trees much taller than the last two, so tall that 15-meter classes probably wouldn't be able to reach the lowest branches. Laura instructed everyone to prepare for lunch, as she did Fran and Karl let out long-retained sighs.

"We're a little over two thirds in," Laura told Rivaille. "It takes about two hours to get this far, and another to get back to the outpost. You see what I meant about Jaime slacking? He probably cut through the middle somewhere to get back for lunch."

Rivaille only nodded back as he secured his horse next to Laura's. Then he followed her example and scaled onto a high branch. There they had their lunch, rushed more like, but it was nice to take a short breather after almost two consecutive hours of galloping. He noticed that while Karl and Fran indulged themselves in their food, Laura still kept a keen eye out on the skyline.

"… See anything?"

"No, I was just thinking… if those things are going to attack us again then I'd rather them to just come now…" Laura murmured quietly. "I don't fancy running into them when we're on flat land."

"… You're worried?" Rivaille

"Worried about you," she grinned slightly. "Even though you passed your assessment, most training you did with Keith was forest-based, right? You'll find that it's a lot more difficult when you've got nothing but a titan in front of you."

"Any tips?"

"Rely on your horse," Laura shrugged. "Try to get a hold onto the titan's back… also don't miss."

"You're shit at teaching."

"Well, excuse me!" she huffed. "And seriously, watch that mouth of yours! I'll have you know that I have the authority to give discipline."

"Oh?" Rivaille turned back to his lunch. "Count me scared."

"…" Laura twitched slightly. "Alright guys! Let's prepare to start moving again."

"Yes, Ma'am!"

"Laura, I've barely started eating," Rivaille glanced back at her. "I'll only be another two minutes."

"Oh? I'm sorry, was the allocated time not enough for you, recruit?" Laura teased. "In the military, we're awful strict with our schedule. Maybe next time you should eat instead of acting all cheeky on me."

Rivaille held back a comment and packed his food up. Now his only motivation to get back to the outpost was dinner and his lunch leftovers. As he stood up and adjusted his gear, Laura let out a little chuckle.

"Geez, Rivaille," she sighed. "I was only joking. We can spare two minutes, hurry up and finish your food."

Laura left him to his lunch as she returned to scouting. Rivaille got his food out and stuffed himself, knowing that he's not going to get another opportunity if he misses this chance. As he ate, he kept conversation to a minimum but he was still curious to what Laura could be looking for. To him, there was virtually nothing to be looking at. Sure, it was one thing keeping an eye on things, but she was staring so intently that he thought there must have been something she was looking at.

Finally she turned around and gave him a quick smile.

"Done?"

"Yes."

"Good," she nodded. "Okay, let's start moving again!"

After lunch, the squad returned to their non-stop galloping. As this was the last stretch of their patrol, everyone seemed less tense than they were this morning. Laura especially who had began engaging in light conversation with Fran and Karl. Though he was essentially part of their group as well, Rivaille stayed quiet and listened on; but he felt more as if he were eavesdropping if more than anything.

"So, Rivaille-san," Karl turned his way. "Coming up to our left is our previous outpost. It's not a checkpoint, but it's more of an indication that we're about halfway back from the last checkpoint. Also at the end of this wall, we turn right to get directly back to our outpost."

"Okay."

Rivaille watched the ruins as they passed by. It was a lot larger compared to the outpost they were in now, but it has also worn down to a hardly usable state. At least that's what he could tell from the tall crumbly brick wall they've been sprinting beside. Also compared to their current outpost, there was little that provided proper cover to hide the building. While the castle they lived in now was surrounded by forest, this one was bare less for a few stray trees.

When they reached the end of the wall, the horses all prepared to turn right. As soon as Laura disappeared around the corner, she let out an ear-piercing shriek.

"What the fu-!"

Laura immediately paled when she got around the corner. There were five titans in the castle's compound. There was one particular 3-meter class that had wandered out just enough that it would have ran into Laura's horse, but she managed to steer her steed out of the way just before they collided into the titan. Though she got out of the way it, the titan soon began to chase after her.

"Captain!"

"Stay back!"

The squad did as they were told and kept at a distance as they tailed the titan after their captain. Rivaille was anxious to help, but he knew that it wasn't needed. As shown by her earlier display, she was more than capable of killing titans; especially a little 3-meter class. Like he thought, she directed her horse in the direction of a tree and positioned herself to get a clean cut of the brute. It was quick and precise, and in no more than a minute did she rush back to the squad.

"Laura, what are your orders?"

"We keep moving," she said as she watched the titans ahead. "It's too risky with two titans above the 10-meter class. We should turn back and circle around-."

As she spoke, the ground began shaking. It was a rhythmic set of thuds that spooked even the horses. This could only mean bad news, and they could almost guess what was heading their way. As they looked to the up to the compound hesitantly, their premonitions were confirmed. Heading straight for them was one of the 10-meter classes; it took large strides with its arm waving back and forth behind it, and it had these large glassy eyes that twinkled at the sight of them.

"Is that…?" Fran squinted her eyes. "Don't you think it's moving too quickly?"

"A deviant?" Karl tightened his hold on his reigns. "What are your orders, captain?"

"…"

Laura stared hard at the incoming titan. It was eyeing her too peculiarly; there was no doubt that it was a deviant. She knew that she was meant to retreat and report back to Erwin if they were to encounter a deviant, but at this point they were far too close to the outpost; and their horses have been worked from this morning to now. There was a chance that someone's horse would give out as they made their retreat. Keeping her squad alive as her top priority right now and she had her doubts on outrunning a deviant; a normal titan perhaps, but not a deviant.

The titan was no farther than fifty meters away now. It'd be no time before it reaches them, and Laura was still stuck in her trance. Rivaille brought her horse beside hers and shook her shoulder.

"Laura!" he called. "Laura! Your orders?"

"… We're splitting into our pairs," she finally spoke. "Karl and Fran, you two circle around the deviant and clear the compound. Let the deviant pass reach us first and you should make it pass okay. You are to wait there after the area is free of titans, understood?"

"Yes, ma'am!"

"Go on then!"

Laura then turned her attention to Rivaille and tilted her head backwards, indicating that they were to start moving. When they broke out into a gallop away from the previous outpost, they heard the titan picking up on their speed and the heavy footsteps became more regular. It was no doubt chasing them, which meant that Karl and Fran got past it safely.

"Okay Rivaille, you and I will take on the deviant-class," her voice was shaky from the movement, but she kept speaking despite the jittering. "I will keep towards the front and draw the titan's attention. At the right time, I want you to steer away, and this is when I'll stop moving. Once it's stopped, I want you to strike it, understood?"

"Don't you think I should draw its attention and you kill it?" he spoke. "You said it yourself, I've got no experience using the maneuver gear on flat land."

"Rivaille, we've got no time to debate this! You might have no experience on flat land, but I'm sure you've never had a wild titan chase on horseback either!" her tone suddenly grew fierce as she yelled. "I thought you said you were going to listen to my orders without fail!"

"…"

In such a situation, he couldn't possibly say that he wasn't confident that he would be able to kill the titan. And he hated the fact that with every second he wasted dwelling on this, the more likely the titan would catch up to them with their fatigued horses.

"Rivaille!" she called again, and this time he snapped his eyes up to meet with hers directly. "Don't doubt yourself now! Don't let your emotions get the better of you. I ask you to do this because I believe you can do it. Have some faith in your captain's judgment!"

"… Yeah," he eventually gave a nod. "Let's do it."

"Alright!" she grinned. "Okay, remember. Rely on your horse, grapple onto the titan's back, and don't miss!"

"Got it."

They moved just as planned. Their pace slowed down considerably, and Laura stayed ahead of Rivaille to keep the titan drawn to her. The titan's heavy footsteps got closer and closer, and soon it was looming right behind them. Laura wanted to look back and give Rivaille a signal, but she knew that it wouldn't work unless he made the first move. He himself had to be prepared for it, if not then he'd just be rushing into his own death.

With the titan trailing after them, they've got a limited amount of time they can keep up for; but it wasn't the time to rush him. They had to be so precise with their time because they only had one shot. If Laura stopped even in a second too late then the plan would fail.

The longer the wait went on for, the more anxious Laura got. She watched their shadows running beside them beadily; even with the massive shadow pursuing them, it didn't seem like he was going to make a move. It was to the point where she wondered if they should swap roles, but eventually Rivaille finally gave his cue.

"I'm moving."

"Good luck."

Laura gave a nod, and the shadow that overlapped hers began breaking away. He moved at a good speed and it didn't seem the titan had turned its attention away from her. Once Rivaille got into position a little further behind the titan, Laura knew it was time for her to get it to stop.

She knew the plan, and she was certain it would work when she thought up of it; but now that she was about to perform it in the flesh, she felt antsier than she liked.

'_Don't let your emotions get the better of you.'_

It was the same words she used on Rivaille.

With her resolve back, Laura took a deep breath and brought her horse into a full sprint ahead. She had to get some distance between the first or else she'd be crushed if she stopped right in front of the titan so abruptly. Once she got further enough, she yanked on the reigns as hard as she could and the horse gave a blaring neigh in protest.

"Now, Rivaille!"

The titan came to a quick stop almost immediately. Laura watched the titan as she climbed off her horse, and prepared her blades in case if makes any erratic goes at her. It was still quite a few meters away from her as she didn't think it would stop so quickly, she realized that she had overlooked that fact that deviants have different reaction times than normal titans.

As she approached back slowly, she watched as Rivaille glided up from the titan's back around its neck. It was now or never. Laura knew that at the chance Rivaille fails then she'll have to step in after. She held her breath as Rivaille spun downwards onto the deviant's neck.

"I couldn't do it!" she heard him call. "Not deep enough!"

When the titan had its flesh cut, it stood up and began thrashing about. It searched for the source of its cut and spotted Rivaille stood right in front of it. The second it made a grab for Rivaille, Laura began sprinting forward as she aimed her maneuver gear. The caught onto its back without a hitch and launched herself off the ground. With the air running past her cheeks, Laura gripped her blades well as she knew she's only got one chance.

The deviant titan immediately reacted to yet another puncture into its back. As it looked over, Laura felt her trajectory shift slightly, but she wasn't thrown off completely. From the corner of her eyes, she saw that the titan had Rivaille tight in its grip as it flailed its arm. Anger seeped into her as she watched Rivaille's legs dangling away under the titan's fingers. She had to do it. She had to kill it in one shot to save him.

Laura took her aim at the nape that had already begun regenerating from Rivaille's earlier cut. It was closing up but the cut was there and prominent. All she had to do was aim for the spot he had hit; the confirmation of his being there and his efforts weren't in vain as she was going to pick up where he left it. It was just a shame that Rivaille had only missed the kill by a few inches.

She flew past the titan, and as she did, she sunk her blades deep into its steaming flesh. As the titan fell, its arms flew upwards from the force of its large body landing. And Laura could only watch as Rivaille was flung onto the grass about five meters away. He landed on his shoulder and his head took a nasty pummel onto the ground.

Laura paled when he didn't move the slightest bit after some time. The titan had already begun vaporing when Laura snapped out of her daze. She then ran towards Rivaille's body and hoped that she wouldn't have to return with her new recruit killed-in-action.

* * *

**Some (attempted) action for your reading pleasure ^_^ and I'm afraid it ends in a cliffhanger! **

**And I had a review asking me when I was going to update, and I just want my readers to know now that I won't be updating very regularly. There's no 'every two weeks' or anything and there may be times when there'll be no updates for a month or two. I'm doing my uni applications this year so busy-busy with school. But I love this story, and really happy that it's getting such positive feedback. But to answer that guest reviewer, I'll upload new chapters as I finish writing them (but more reviews will probably mean faster writing ;D). **

**Thank you to the reviewers! And also a big thanks to the new readers that alerted and favorited this story! :)**

**Don't forget to leave a review!**


	4. Responsibility

**Shingeki no Kyojin**

_**In Freedom or Death**_

_**Chapter Four: Responsibility**_

* * *

It was her fault. It was definitely her fault. Laura was frozen as she watched Hanji and Richter treat to Rivaille. Hanji wiped the blood off his head while Richter examined the shoulder he had fallen on. Rivaille was semi-conscious and didn't move an inch unless they instructed him to. He spotted her standing at the doorway of the room, he opened his mouth as if to call out to her, but the words never came and he turned back to stare at the ground.

Laura tore her gaze away from him and walked into the hallway. She walked to the edge of the wall and began tapping her foot. She was thankful that Rivaille wasn't killed, but she was also anxious, knowing that it was probably due to her poor instructions that he'd gotten hurt. Or perhaps she had drastically overlooked something, maybe he had been right and he should have acted as the decoy.

"Heya, Laura."

She jolted from the light tap on her shoulder, she immediately spun around and gave an accusing glare. Of course Jaime paid her look no mind and returned with a grin instead.

"What are you standing around for?"

"Rivaille's hurt," she eyed the infirmary.

"Seriously?" Jaime leant forward and peeked into the room. "Ouch, looks bad. What happened?"

"A deviant," she fidgeted on the spot as she replied. "I think I made a bad call."

She was jumpy and she hasn't looked away from the ground for a while now. The last time she was like this was after the last expedition; they had lost a couple of friends then, she wasn't responsible for anything but for some reason it was still her fault. She was always desperately trying to justify reasons for the tragedies that have occurred, and when she couldn't think of any she automatically jumped to the conclusion that she was somehow responsible. That it was somehow her fault that they were killed.

"… Laura, you've never make a bad call."

"… Yeah…?" she met his eyes hesitantly. "Well, I did this time."

"… Well um, I was actually looking for you guys. Commander wants to see us all in his office."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," when she didn't reply, he placed a hand on her shoulder. "Why don't I go ahead with Hanji and Richter? I'll explain things with Erwin."

"Yeah, okay," she nodded quick as he headed in. "And Jaime?"

"Hm?"

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it, princess."

Laura hanged around outside as she waited for everyone else to leave, and when they walked past her Hanji gave a reassuring _"he'll be fine". _After they disappeared down the corridor, she tiptoed over to the doorway and peeked in. They had lied him down on a bed, and he looked asleep. She walked into the room and sat on the seat beside his bed.

The man was paler than usual and his head was bandaged up. Laura didn't want to look at his shoulder, it was jarred and his bones were probing at his skin unnaturally. Laura shuddered and leant forward onto the bed, elbows sinking into the mattress as guilt-ridden thoughts ran through her head. She hid her face in her palms in fear that tears will begin rolling, but before they could she felt the sheets under her shift.

She jolted back up immediately and saw that Rivaille had sat up and was resting against the headboard, eyes piercing straight through her. She quivered slightly and sat back onto the seat.

"… H-How are you feeling?"

She hated the shakiness in her voice, but she was on the verge of tears and it didn't help that he was staring holes through her. She looked down and began playing with her fingers, she couldn't take looking at him, meeting his gaze head-on; it was too much for her.

"I'm fine."

Laura felt her nose grow prickly and her eyes wet again. She hasn't felt this weak in a long time, she hated that he was protecting her by lying but she couldn't think of a way to express her thoughts. Gripping her hands on her lap, she began speaking again.

"… I'm so sorry, Rivaille," Laura released a quiet sob. "I can't believe you almost got killed on your first patrol. I really am a terrible teacher. And a terrible captain… I'm so sorry."

"… Laura, I'm fine-."

"You're not!" her eyes shot back up, giving him a knowing look. "Your shoulder shouldn't be sticking out like that, your head is wet with your own blood, and it's all my fault."

"They said it was just dislocated," Rivaille murmured, eyes wandering away, unsure of what to say really. "Four-eyes said she'll pop it back to place later."

She didn't say anything afterwards, she just stared at him as if she hadn't heard him at all. This worried him. He wanted to find the words to reassure her but he didn't know where to begin.

After a moment, her gaze fell onto her lap again. Those bright green eyes of hers vanishing from his view; he watched as her head bobbed up and down, it was a strange movement and her shoulders were shaking. It was then when he realized what was happening; she was crying, and not just for any reason, but she was crying for his sake. At this moment, she wasn't his captain anymore; she was just another seventeen year old crying because she felt responsible for his near-death experience.

"Hey Laura, look at me."

She obliged, meeting his dark gray eyes, he saw that she was quivering again. He knew he had to say something now. Anything that'd put her mind at ease and stop herself from thinking it's her fault.

"I'm really fine," he tried again. "… And it's not your fault; any moron could have understood what you meant. I understood everything. I was just careless."

Once again she didn't reply, and this time he clicked his tongue in annoyance, with his good arm he reached for her hand. First thing he noticed was how cold her fingers were, they said he had a fever but she felt much colder than a normal person. She also didn't flinch away – definitely a good sign.

"Listen, I really did understand everything you said," he started again, speaking to her in a slow calm voice. "_Rely on your horse, grapple onto the titan's back, and don't miss. _I remember everything, and as plain as it was it was simple to follow; but like you said, I didn't have the experience and couldn't finish the job. It's not your fault, in fact you saved my ass, so stop blaming yourself."

As he spoke, Laura looked as if she was going to cry again.

"Hey kid, stop crying already!" he frowned. "It really doesn't hurt anymore or anything. Save your tears for when some idiot actually dies."

"… Yeah, yeah, okay," she finally gave a smile, her eyes fell lax and she gripped back into his hand. "I was just really worried and… I'm glad you're alright."

"… Yeah, I'm fine now."

Now that she has finally calmed down, Rivaille released her hand and looked away sheepishly. It was as if the pair had just suddenly realized they were holding hands. It wasn't anything substantially intimate or embarrassing but it came to them somewhat as a shock considering they've only known each other for a little over a week.

"… I'm going to go back to sleep."

"Alright, tell me if there's anything you need."

Rivaille just nodded as he lied back down on his pillow. It was hard to believe that he got worn out just with all that talking; he couldn't remember the last time he had to exert himself so much while taking part in a conversation. He now understood just how horrifying it could be to speak to girls; well, Laura at least. And her eyes must have been magically connected to a well or something by the amounts she can cry; he also concluded that comforting a crying captain was something he never wanted to do again.

As he began dozing off, he heard her sniffling again from the crying earlier. The mattress creaked beside him, and he felt something warm shift beside him. Opening an eye, he saw her head resting beside his arm. Her breathing indicated that she had fallen asleep. He couldn't help but give a short smile; both at how easily she fell asleep and how sweet it was to have her by his bedside.

'… _Not bad.'_

**XoXo**

Laura woke under the comfort of warm sheets in a proper bed. She was still in the infirmary, but she's somehow gotten herself into a bed. After a moment of recollecting herself, she sat up and saw that she was alone in the room. After a little more inspecting, she realized that the bed she was in was the very same one Rivaille was in earlier in the day. She rubbed her eyes as she climbed out of the bed. At least a few hours must have passed; she could feel her back and neck stiff from the unusual nap.

She made her way up to the captains' quarters, in hope that she'll find someone to give her an explanation on what happened. To her dismay, she only found Jaime lounging around the common room. There was a small stack of letters on the table beside him and a book in hand.

"Hey," he greeted. "Sleep well?"

"I guess so, yeah," she replied. "Where's everyone else?"

"Not sure," he shrugged before pointing to the stack. "Your usual letter's here."

He lowered his book onto his lap and fiddled around with the stack in search for the envelope addressed to her. When he found it, he passed it over to her and returned to his book.

"Scoot over," she waited as he retracted his legs, making room on the sofa. "What're you reading?"

"Not sure myself, but I heard it's written by a guy that's like a religion conspiracy theorist or something."

"Oh?" she nodded as she scanned through the contents of her own letter. "Sounds fun. You enjoying it?"

"Totally," he glanced over to her. "And what did your brother say?"

"… The usual," she shrugged. "He mentioned my mum freaking out over some devil's book though, think he's talking about the very one in your hands?"

"Oh yeah, most likely."

Jaime grinned as he turned back to his book. There were moments like these between the two – when they were able to just sit side by side without Jaime cracking a bad joke or Laura losing her temper. It didn't happen often, but there were times when Jaime unwinds down to a drastically more composed demeanor; and when he did, Laura liked spending time with him.

"By the way, about the meeting you missed."

"Yeah?"

"The commander's trying to fill up the vacant captain space, and we were asked for our opinions on the nominated candidates."

"Who're the candidates?"

"No one from your squad, but there's two from Hanji's, one of Richter's and one of mine."

"I feel ostracized."

"… Huh?"

"Excluded."

"Jeez, don't go sprouting crazy words all of a sudden like that," Jaime sighed, clapping the book shut. "My reading and writing level is less than mediocre compared to yours."

"It's not like I said it to make you feel bad," she grumbled back. "… So any favorites?"

"Yeah, some bloke named Mike in Hanji's squad," Jaime shrugged. "Apparently he accompanied the commander when he visited the capital a while back. Even Richter was pushing for him."

"Seen him around but I've never spoken to him."

"Me neither," Jaime yawned lightly. "… Whose squad is in charge of dinner tonight?"

"Richter's I think."

"Why don't we go do something fun?" he stood up eagerly, grabbing the letter out of her hand. "Let's go swipe some food."

"No, dinner's only an hour away," she reached for her letter with a light frown. "Jaime, give it back."

"You get it back when we go steal something from the kitchen."

"Are you serious?" her frown deepened when he nodded. "You're such a child! Fine then! Give it here!"

She snatched the crumpled paper back and pocketed it after folding it carefully. Jaime then pulled her off her seat and dragged her downstairs. She wasn't up for snagging something from the kitchen as it set a bad example but she couldn't deny that she was hungry. She's decided that if worst comes to worst and they get caught, Laura will simply put the blame on Jaime.

"… Oh yeah! You missed the grossest arm popping ever!" Jaime suddenly got excited. "It made a noise and everything. I'm surprised Rivaille didn't like cry or something."

"What? When was this?"

"After the meeting we got back to the infirmary and we found you two sleeping like babies," Jaime recalled. "Which, by the way, I was a little jealous because you never accept my sleepover invites."

"I just fell asleep," Laura frowned. "And your 'sleepover' obviously has hidden meaning behind it!"

The two continued to bicker until they reached the kitchen, and which by then they've already alerted the squad inside and had no luck taking anything as they were vigilant of the two captains.

**XoXo**

In the middle of the night, Laura found herself lying in bed as awake as a person could be. The irregular nap in her normal sleep cycle has obviously done a number on her (for tonight at least). She slowly climbed out of bed and slipped into her indoor shoes. With the curtains shut, her room was completely pitch black; she struggled to feel out the matches and candle, but once she did she managed to light the lamp.

There wasn't much she could do at night, perhaps she'd get herself a cup of tea before trying to sleep again; but she wasn't all that keen on heading down to the pantry herself. She could always help out with guard duty, though it may seem meddlesome of her seeing that it wasn't her squad on duty. Laura picked up the little lantern and headed outside. She supposed she could always do with a good book for a light read.

As she arrived in the library, the first thing she noticed was that there was someone else in the room. There was already a lit lantern on one of the desks, and sitting cross-legged on the sofa was none other than Rivaille. He immediately looked up when she walked in; he looked surprised for a moment before placing his book down.

"… Good evening," Laura tried not to sound too surprised. "I didn't expect to run into anyone."

"I can't sleep."

"Me too," she shrugged and placed the lantern down. "The nap was too much for my normal sleep pattern."

"… My shoulder stings when I lie on it."

Laura's eyes flickered to the bandages under his loose sweater. He caught her looking and rubbed his shoulder lightly.

"It only hurts when I put weight on it," he said. "It's fine right now."

"What about your head?"

"The bleeding stopped."

"Maybe you should sleep in the infirmary?" she suggested. "I think the mattresses are supposed to be softer than the ones in the dorms."

"It's fine," he looked away. "I'm not really sleepy."

"Right."

Laura gave him a little nod before walking by him and towards the bookshelves. The castle had a large library, and there was a large collection of books. Laura wandered through the maze of shelves as she browsed the titles.

Though she had only wanted a light read, most of the books here are more advanced non-fiction titles. Most spoke of the history of the walls or the religious principles of the creation of the walls. Towards the end of the shelves, on the last smallest shelf there was finally some fiction. Not much, and it was mostly poetry; but it was better than nothing. She picked out a lighter book from the bunch and headed back to where Rivaille was.

"Mind if I sit with you?"

"Go ahead."

Rivaille made room for her on the large sofa and she sat on the other end comfortably. She placed her lantern on the end table next to hers and opened her book to the first page. As she read her book, she couldn't help but feel slightly tense sitting beside Rivaille. They weren't close at all; at least a good few inches apart but with the room being so still and silent, it felt as if he was sitting right beside him with their shoulders touching.

As she grew more aware of the man sitting beside her, she realized that he hasn't flipped a page since she's sat down. Whether it was awkward shifting or flipping of pages, it's been her making noise the whole time. Lingering on a page she's caught herself rereading over, she decided to take a chance and peek over at his direction.

She bucked up the courage and slowly turned and peeped through her fringe. He was looking at her, directly at her in fact. The book in his hand looked long forgotten and he didn't move the slightest when she turned to him.

"… What's the matter?"

"… Nothing," he looked away eventually. "I was just thinking…"

"About?"

Another silence. Laura waited a couple of seconds for his reply, but when he didn't say anything she just returned to her book, thinking that he had ignored her.

"Your hair…"

"Hm?" she looked up from her book again. "What about my hair?"

"… What do I call it?"

"You mean the colour?"

"Yeah."

Laura placed her book down and reached for a strand of hair to examine. It's been a while since someone has asked or noted on her physical appearance and she doesn't quite know what to say.

"Um… auburn, maybe?" she replied with a nervous chuckle. "… I'm afraid I've never really given it much thought."

"Auburn, huh?" he considered it as he watched her. "… It's nice."

"You really think so?"

He found it difficult to reply, more like he didn't know how to reply. He's never been good with words or girls for a matter. So it was no surprise that he was having problems speaking to a girl that was even younger than himself. Averting his eyes elsewhere, he gave a slow nod. Laura felt her chest squeeze up when he did so. She snapped back down to her book anxiously and hoped she hasn't turned as red as her hair.

"… Thank you, Rivaille."

"It's no big deal."

"Maybe not to you," Laura dipped her face forward, hiding her smile. "But girls do like their compliments."

Rivaille watched as she resumed her reading. She had no idea the kind of affect she had on him; she was the prize on a golden pedestal and him the entranced fool unworthy of her. The more he was in her presence, the more he grew fond of her.

She had returned to reading her book, and it was a little surprising how much she dropped her guard after that short conversation. Earlier on, she was so fidgety and cautious of him but now it was as if she'd grown completely used to be presence. He watched as she leaned backwards and rested her neck behind.

The moment he was about to settle down, she let out a tiny yawn. Laura used the book to cover her mouth and she rubbed her eyes dry of tears. She made an effort to continue to read but it wasn't long when another yawn escaped her.

"Sorry, Rivaille, looks like I've finally gotten tired," she shut her book and she stood up. "I'm going to head upstairs first. Goodnight."

Rivaille had no clue what let him to panic the way he did when he watched her head for the door; but whatever the reason was, he sure wanted to slap himself for it afterwards. The second Laura stepped out of the room, he stood up and called after her.

"Laura, wait."

"Yes?"

She came to a halt and looked over her shoulder. Her eyes still tired but a smile present. He was at a complete lost for words; he had no clue why he called after her or what he expected out of it but now he desperately needed to think of something to say or otherwise make himself look like a complete fool.

"What is it?" she stepped back into the room. "Does it hurt somewhere?"

"No," he met her eyes slowly. "… I-... I- can't actually read."

Immediate regret.

The look she gave him was priceless. It was as if she hadn't decided if to laugh or cry. Her lips quivered into a smile as she looked away, trying to hide her trembling face from him.

"Seriously?" she managed to mumble.

"Yeah."

When he confirmed it, she let out a tiny titter. It's not the kind of laughter he usually saw when she was with the other captains, but a smaller more feminine one – cute even. Perhaps he'd always felt a little envious when he saw her laughing with her friends, but he now realized that he much preferred this sweet little smile.

The expression he made next must have startled her, because she looked down and took a quick step back. He didn't even realize that he began frowning. He rubbed the back of his neck as he thought of what to say next.

"I'm sorry for laughing," she bowed her head slightly. "It's just that you've been sitting there with a book in your hand this whole time… I just… wasn't expecting that."

"It's fine."

Laura walked back over to the sofa and dropped herself into the seat she was in before. When she did so, he sat back down beside her. Unlike last time, he was a little closer to her than before, but that was only because she sat towards the middle.

"… So you can't read, Rivaille?"

"No."

"Would you like to learn how?"

"What?"

"I'm offering to teach you," she gave him one of her winning smiles. "So do you want to learn how to?"

Laura wondered if he was one of those guys that would let their pride get in the way. When she saw his regular frown, she knew that she had hit it right on.

"… Hey, it's not like it's uncommon to be illiterate," she said slowly. "I know for a fact that most soldiers only learn after enlisting. It's just one of those things."

"… Are you pitying me?"

"Of course not!" she sighed. "I just thought I could help you out."

"Don't need it."

"You were the one that called after me like you had some urgent business."

"… Don't get full of yourself, brat."

"At least I'm an educated brat," she did her best not to sound too condescending but it was difficult with the attitude he was putting up. She was asked to befriend him and she knew it'd take effort but not this difficult. "… A brat that is willing to teach you how to read and write if you are willing to learn."

"… You sure you can do it?"

"What do you mean?"

"You remember that you're a crappy teacher, right?"

As he spoke those words Laura simply smiled; she almost rolled her eyes but she refrained from doing so. At least she's made some progress with Rivaille today. Minus the fact she nearly got him killed, he seemed somewhat more open now.

"Well, okay then. From this point on we'll meet on evenings on the days we're not on patrol," she said. "Does that sound okay?"

"How many days is that in a week?"

"That's four days for us."

"Okay."

"Great," she stood up again, tucking the book under her arm and reaching for the lantern. "I'm going to get some rest and you should too."

"Like I said, I'm not sleepy."

"Rivaille…" she sighed. "Well, take care of yourself. Goodnight."

"Night."

* * *

**Thanks for all your support**

_**and**_

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